Valentine Jokes

When you think of Valentine’s Day, the emotions that come to mind are intensity, intimacy, passion and romance. However, there is nothing like a light moment which can help make your day more lively and special. Here are some rib-tickling Jokes on Love & Marriage, which will help you tease your loved one or bring a smile on their face! Also send Valentine Flowers to India to make this day more perfect.

“Three men were once discussing what they got their ladies when courting them. Among the main things discussed were the diamonds they had to buy during the engagement. One man said, ‘Our relationship is different. My wedding has actually brought me three rings.’ The others were amazed. ‘How’s that’, they asked. ‘Well, there is the engagement ring and the wedding ring’, he said. ‘We got that too’, the others chimed. ‘What’s the third?’ ‘Suffering’, the man said slowly.”

A man once went up to the newly engaged couple to congratulate them. Taking the boy aside, he said to him, “Until married a man in incomplete. Once married, he is finished!”

A couple was once on their honeymoon. The man had arranged to take his wife on an exotic jungle safari, arranging for a stay in the most lavish resort available. With no expense spared, things were really laid out for them, but the wife still didn’t look like she has having a good time. For a long time the husband did all he could to get close and keep his wife in good humour. Finally, he lost his temper and said, “Look at all this around, can’t you see that I’ve done all this just for you, and not one smile! I’ve spent most of my money just to make this honeymoon special. What’s your problem?” “That’s just what I’m worried about!” she said.

A girl once snuggled up to her husband and said, “You were always so loving and caring. You would surprise me with gifts, take me to fancy dinners, and be the most chivalrous person ever. Those years were just so special. What’s happened to make all that change?” “Marriage,” he said.

A man asked his wife, “Would you continue to love me as much when I am old, if I am confined to a wheelchair, lose all my teeth and have no hair left?” “Depends on what you are leaving behind”, the wife replied.

Three men were discussing who had the best life at home. The first said, “My wife calls me up at five every evening to say she can’t wait to see me. She waits impatiently for me to get home, and has a list of things we are going to do together that evening.”

“That sounds exhausting!” the first man replied. “When I get home in the evening, the lights are dimmed, there is soft music playing in the living room, and there is always wine and hot food waiting for me at the table.”

The third man was silent. “What happens when you get home Al?” they asked. “Well,” he said. “When I get home I need to let myself in, the food is lying on the table, just at room temperature, and my wife is never around when I’m eating.”
“Oh man!” the others said, “I’m sorry. Where is your wife?”
“She’s up in the bedroom waiting for me to get between the sheets”, he answered, a twinkle in his eye.